the wind cries mary. (maybe tina).

AFTER ALL JACKS ARE IN THEIR BOXES
AND THE CLOWNS HAVE ALL GONE TO BED
YOU CAN HEAR HAPPINESS STAGGERING ON DOWN THE STREET
FOOTPRINTS DRESSED IN RED

AND THE WIND WHISPERS MARY

For the first time, in a very long time, I have felt a whisper "come hither" in the air. For probably the first time in my life, my mom is on board to my reckless abandon. I believe the "well you can do what you want" sealed the deal. This encroaching experience is about to set my future in motion. Not because it holds any secrets, but because it holds new lessons and habits and idiosyncrasies unique to my particular combination of events.

A BROOM IS DREARILY SWEEPING
UP THE BROKEN PIECES OF YESTERDAY'S LIFE
SOMEWHERE A QUEEN IS WEEPING
SOMEWHERE A KING HAS NO WIFE

AND THE WIND CRIES MARY

If I am going to do something like this, then it's the time. No strings attached. I am free to roam the wild and only enjoy things that bring me pleasure, not suffer through things that make me miserable. Selfish, much? I hope not. I hope to grow out of 22 and into 23 after this. Today, many friends and especially my mom have asked,"So when are you coming back?" and the truth is,"I haven't bought a ticket home, yet."

It's not like I am thinking something will happen for me out west. What I imagine will happen is that it will be like a month long spring break. My mom was trying to encourage me to call so and so, or set up interviews. That all sounds reasonable thanks for the nudge, mom; however, I had envisioned a low expectation visit. I want my goals to be what I plan on having for lunch or dinner. Did I meet or fail those expectations? I mean baby steps really. Let's be realistic, I have very limited cash flow. Not much to show for the lack thereof either.

THE TRAFFIC LIGHTS THEY TURN A BLUE TOMORROW
AND SHINE THER EMPTINESS DOWN ON MY BED
THE TINY ISLAND SAGS DOWNSTREAM
CAUSE THE LIFE THAT LIVED IS DEAD

AND THE WIND SCREAMS MARY

I am not sure what is in store for me in the future, near or far. I tell people that I just want fate to hit me smack in the middle of the street. I suppose I have to go chasing fate half way around the world. Not sure where he is or what he looks like but I figure if I have low expectations, then I would meet him cordially like an old friend. We could share sunset cocktails on the beaches of Kaua'i. Or we could brush past each other in the airport. All I know is that fate is my journey. Maybe all I have to gain is meeting myself for the second or third time in my life now, 'cause the life that lived is dead.

WILL THE WIND EVER REMEMBER
THE NAMES IT HAS BLOWN IN THE PAST
AND WITH ITS CRUTCH ITS OLD AGE AND ITS WISDOM
IT WHISPERS "NO, THIS WILL BE THE LAST"

AND THE WIND CRIES MARY

Whatever falls upon my lap will be a welcome change to my constant view of South Carolina. Perhaps, if I have nothing to gain then it is appreciation for my under appreciated, taken for granted Low Country lifestyle. I definitely can't wait to put it all on cruise control for a while. Hopefully, get this funk out of my system and return ready to create that identity for myself because I have been suffering from quite the identity crisis.