new soul.

I'm a new soul I came to this strange world
Hoping I could learn a bit bout how to give and take
But since I came here, felt the joy and the fear
Finding myself making every possible mistake

This week, I have completely sensitive and unhappy. My birthday has a way of bringing it out in me, I guess. I am like a stubbed toe throbbing in pain, just waiting for the misery to subside. I just feel like I can't do anything right lately. So I am changing my surroundings for awhile.

See I'm a young soul in this very strange world
Hoping I could learn a bit bout what is true and fake
But why all this hate? try to communicate
Finding trust and love is not always easy to make

In three weeks, I leave for Northern California. Similar to Elizabeth's journey in "Eat, Pray, Love" I will embark on my own travels for self-discovery, self-satisfaction, and self-appreciation. My travels to CA will coincide with the Buddhist New Year and provide much needed prayer for my starving soul. In five weeks, from now, I will be boarding a flight to Kaua'i to meet many new friends and learn one better. These opportunities have fallen into my lap and well I was one to seize them. I look forward to learning what is true and fake and search for trust and love, especially since I know of little quantities of each.

This is a happy end
Cause you don't understand
Everything you have done
Why's everything so wrong

This is a happy end
Come and give me your hand
I'll take you far away

In the meantime, I will be working my ass off to pay for the rest of my flights. Shame on me for reckless spending in Greenville. Yet, I do have RJD2 to look forward to on April 1st in Asheville. It will be my last Southeastern social engagement until the middle of May. Well, ok, April 5th to see Sol Driven Train at the Pourhouse after the Cooper River Bridge Run. I hope to stay on top of my blog during my travels. So please, comment often and check back regularly. I have never been happier for my decisions. I usually never let an idea take off on whim like this. I usually try to live in a petri-dish of control, but where has that gotten me? I still make the worst possible mistakes within the petri-dish. Like I am invincible or something. This will be a rude awakening to break the plastic and shatter expectations. It has been greatly overdue.

I'm a new soul
I came to this strange world
Hoping I could learn a bit bout how to give and take
But since I came here, felt the joy and the fear
Finding myself making every possible mistake

This was my "Free Will Astrology" from the Charleston City Paper this week,

'Musician Sarah McLachlan told the crowd at one of her concerts: 'I feel great about singing really depressing songs." In the U2 song " A Man and A Woman," Bono sings, "The only pain is to feel nothing at all." They are your role models in the coming week, Pisces. I hope they inspire you to feel grateful for your capacity to experience such intensive emotions. You're lucky to be so sensitive! You're blessed to have so much vital force! So please celebrate your talent for feeling melancholy and overwhelmed. Congratulate yourself for being such a connoisseur of guilt, confusion, and anxiety. You're more alive than other people. You've got a soul as big and wide and deep as the Amazon River.'