don't wake me up.

Today I was watching "Anne of Avonlea" and missed how I envisioned myself as Anne. I wanted to carry the burden of a boy, I am not sure why-perhaps to be stronger or better for my parents, just as she wonders if Marilla and Matthew would have been better off if she were the boy that they initially wanted. Which got me to thinking about burdens and dating, weird I know. I have always been one to let the guy make the grand gesture and would return the favor in kind, a drink for a drink, a meal for a meal...I always felt that I didn't like feeling as if someone had power or expectations over me because they took me out. My company is priceless, so we're even right?

You came to me
In seamless sleep
Slipped right in
Behind my eye
On the back of my mind
We swam a sea
Of pretty sights and chandelier skies
I swore I could feel you breathe
It was all so real to me

And I thought about how Anne never imagined getting married...two proposals later and her kindred spirit on his death bed quickly changed her mind. Hopefully, we aren't driven to those extremes to make drastic realizations, but I couldn't help remembering that I would not have any desire to marry, or like boys. I just wanted to roam free in my own "Green Gables" and romanticize about savoring my surroundings. I suppose not much has changed, has it?

The light had slipped through the window
The morning ripped you away oh

Don't wake me up
I am still dreaming
The story's undone
Unravel at the seams
Don't wake me up
Death is misleading
And when I fall asleep
Sleep with your ghost

What I thought was most provocative, to me at this moment in my life, was when Anne invites Katherine to Green Gables and points out that she has shut life out, and life has shut her out. It can happen to anyone. So, naturally, I imagined if I had been shutting life out for a while. I think I have invited it back in, thankfully, because I would want to change that. Live differently.

I looked in the dark
The room calm and cold
And quiet hollow
I am such a haunted soul
Your ghost has gone to bed
Its all cold

Then, at the end of 240 mins of honest to goodness VHS, Gilbert Blythe recovers from scarlet fever! Gil and Anne take a stroll over Barry's pond and take some time to ponder. Of course, they end up making plans for their future, but Anne unrolls this outburst of sheer enrichment,"I went looking for my ideals outside of myself. I've discovered it's not what the world holds for you, it's what you bring to it. The dreams dearest to my heart are right here."

The light had slipped through the window
The morning ripped you away oh

At that moment, I just had to soak that in. In excitement I began to anticipate what my seven birthday wishes would be in three weeks. What dreams I would imagine and where would they take me. Suddenly, it hit me, hello time's a tickin' and possibilities should be knocking at my door. In the meantime, don't wake me up.

Don't wake me up
I am still dreaming
The story's undone
Unravel at the seams
Don't wake me up

Death is misleading

And when I fall asleep
Sleep with a ghost

Oh you were a fire caught in a storm
Memories like embers keep us warm
You will leave me in the morning me